Breaking News

I am a paper snob.
I work at two newspapers, I do not own an e-reader, and I journal in a notebook. However, even I must admit that when it comes to breaking news, despite all my pretentious, old-fashioned instincts, I have become dependent on Twitter.

I marvel at the speed that international news is delivered to the palm of my hand. When legendary sci-fi author Terry Pratchett passed away, I knew within six minutes of the announcement leaking out to the world by, of course, his Twitter account. I was amazed. Just 20 years ago when you died, it would probably take until several hours later or possibly the next day for the public to know, and now, billions of people can know in mere minutes. There are countless online news websites that are updated every minute of the day, and social media can spread news faster than I could even write it down.

As a journalist (and snob), I admit that this radical change of how news is delivered and absorbed is daunting. I am stuck between my love of the smell of newsprint and the thrill of seeing my own words on a page, and the fact that I run three blogs and that my work portfolio for my first job outside of college will be a website, and not a folder of clippings.
I know that online news is not just the way of the future—it’s already the way of the present. The thing is, I still love reading papers, but simply for different reasons than online news appeals to me. Papers are fantastic for profiles, features, and in-depth information on stories you can get in brief articles or 140-character blurbs. Papers have character, unique thought, and a design completely different than a web page. And frankly, there is something very satisfyingly permanent about seeing your name in print, whether in a story or a byline.

I will continue to read and work for print publications until either they or I cease to exist, whichever comes first. But I now accept the internet as my primary breaking news source with open arms. My mind can be at peace knowing that print newspapers and online news sources are not in competition, they are simply two different animals. And I am both a dog and a cat person.

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Back in black

Dear Followers,

I am honestly, truly, completely shocked that 66 of you have stuck around this whole time despite my inactivity. I truly appreciate it because I definitely want to get back into blogging, hopefully to slowly get down a path towards being able to write freelance after college until I can land a job at a respectable publication. Probably will post a lot of feminist rants and photos and things. May or may not lose a few of you along the way. We’ll have to see.

I could write a “what’s new with me” list, but what’s the point, really? You guys don’t care that I got a job at a real newspaper where I live (a name I’ll withhold for the time being), got a promotion to layout editor at my school’s paper, or that I’m back in black because, as the great and inspiring Jim Gaffigan once said, “I’m wearing black because it’s easier than working out.”

Re-invention

I am constantly re-inventing myself, and it makes me wonder if I’ll ever totally find who I am/who I want to be, or if it will be a constantly changing idea. Does everyone experience this type of thing? I have friends who seem so concretely sure of who they are. They are like beautiful little rocks. They seem to know who they are, what they like, and they stand next to those aspects of themselves with steadfast clarity.

Then there’s me, sitting over there, constantly getting rid of/re-wearing clothes, trying to act differently, be different, to see what honestly reflects who I am. Unfortunately, who I am right now and who I want to be are two different women, and I’m not sure how to bridge that gap. If I try to act more how I wish I was rather than who I truly am, does that make me a hypocrite, or am I just learning and slowly making this acting more of a reality?

This brings me to aesthetics. I am perfectly aware that appearance isn’t everything. That being said, the way I dress is one of my absolute favorite ways to express myself. My outfit definitely affects my confidence level, which is why despite what I might put off, I usually think these things through pretty thoroughly. There are several online communities (and some in real life) who all dress/present themselves with the same type of aesthetic, and I want to belong to one of them. Somewhere. But I’m not sure exactly where I fit in there, either.

The other problem is, I’ll become really attracted to a certain kind of aesthetic, and identify heavily with it for a few months or even just a few weeks, but then it’s like I’ve pressed the refresh button and I’m suddenly off on a different path.

The main thing I wonder is what I asked earlier in this post: does everyone experience this? Or is my life just…overly-transitional? 

R&R

Left school for the weekend despite being invited to things, events happening, and having work to do, I needed to get away from it all for a little bit. I was doing fine, even considering telling my parents “sorry, I’ll have to come home another time” because of everything that was going on, but then on Thursday I just started feeling…ill.  

I hate that since my life has gotten to the ideal place that I’ve wanted it to be in for awhile, yet I can’t seem to handle it. I have a lot of different friends, I’m an editor on the school paper, and literally just landed my ideal part time job working on an actual, real newspaper. My weight could be better, but I’ve been getting a lot of positive attention for my looks lately, which is definitely weird. I am not at all used to getting compliments based solely on my appearance from strangers. In fact, it pretty much never happened until I got back to college three weeks ago.

This is such an in-between place in life, even more so than high school, I think. In high school you’re still a kid, for the most part you kind of know what your next step will be, and you still live under someone else’s control. In college/around college age (at least for myself and many other people I know), you’re caught in a strange place. You still identify with teenagers and teen culture, you’re not totally financially independent but you’re almost…transitioning into it. You’re in a learning environment, yet many professors will treat you more like an equal than a kid they’re babysitting. You start looking for real jobs, wondering about your career, wondering about if casual dating could become a serious relationship, or maybe not.

It is kind of overwhelming. I’m an adult. I can vote, I do not live with my parents, I have a real job in a real office. Yet I still go to school. I still only can work part-time because of school, so I’m still dependent on my parents financially, yet I no longer have to follow their rules or constantly try to meet their expectations. 

I wonder where I’m going.

“Nothing Good Happens After 2 a.m.”

Whether you’re into sitcoms or not, there is a lot to be learned from How I Met Your Mother. One of those things being the classic lesson of “nothing good happens after 2 a.m.” I believe that has a lot of merit. I don’t really want to be awake right now, but it’s just been one of those nights. I felt like it was 9:00 when it was really past midnight, and now it’s 2:50 am and I’m here right now, sitting in total darkness aside from the ethereal glow of the ever-present laptop, and I sincerely hope my roommate is really sleeping and my quiet typing sounds aren’t bothering her. I would move somewhere else, but I’m pretty committed to staying in this bed. Perhaps just being here will help promote sleepy thoughts and then sleepy actions. Will this post be any good, or will it be dampened by the time limits of the 2 a.m. rule? As the writer, this is not something I can answer (sorry).

I said in my last post that I’d write something about myself, but I’m not sure what people really want to know. I’m 85% sure nobody will ever really read this. I say 85% because I did tell some of my friends about it, and I may or may not link it up to the class blog sometime this semester if I get up the guts/if I actually post some relevant, activist posts or share some good ideas. I feel like I’m not really that interesting of a person. Whenever I’m in a situation where I have to be involved in icebreaker activities, I can never seem to come up with an interesting fact about myself that will make me memorable or even just momentarily noteworthy. Here’s my introduction either way:

My name is Sarah. I was born in Florida, grew up in Florida, and I go to college here in Florida. I eat Lean Cuisines as snacks even though they’re not supposed to be snacks. I use my boyfriend’s Netflix even though I’m really not supposed to do that either, but I don’t want to pay $7 a month to binge-watch crime dramas like a good and decent person. I try to be friendly to everyone I meet, but I have an oddly sarcastic inner core. To be completely and totally honest, I’m really nothing special. That’s something I wish I could change, but I’m still young, and I still have time. I don’t make new year’s resolutions, and I don’t eat shellfish. I tend to apologize too much or for no reason. I have nice eyes that can look either green or blue or even close to grey, depending on what I’m wearing/how close you are to my face (looking closely, you will find that they are, in fact, just green). I’m good at board games, and I’m learning how to crochet, and believe I have some potential there even though right now all I can make are scarves. I eat a lot. I’m not overweight, but I’m definitely not thin, and that’s all I’m going to write about that subject because I think whoever may be reading this will find that I will most likely be bringing up body image, particularly my own, quite frequently. 

I plan on traveling a lot this year in the hopes that I will learn some actual useful things that you can only pick up from leaving the general 100-mile radius of your hometown, which even in college I have failed to do (I’m about 77 miles from my house, give-or-take). Maybe my travel experiences will magically transform me into a more worldly woman. Perhaps I will do something grand, interesting, or even bizarre, and at last have something to say about myself during icebreaker games. Speaking of which, I feel like as a legal adult I should be way past having to do them, but it’s dawning on me more and more that no matter how old I get, I’ll be breaking ice my whole life. I should like to think that by the time I’m introducing myself to everyone at my retirement home, I’ll finally have an interesting fact to blurt out.